Today we lost one of my favorite’s of Hana’s hats. We were walking in the panhandle park in San Francisco, Hana in her stroller, Poppy on the leash and I was lost in thought about whether Hana should be put on the heart transplant list soon, maybe even now. I stopped to check on her and I saw that her head had slumped forward because she fell asleep and her hat was gone. Now, if you are wondering why I care so much about a hat, it is probably because you have not seen the hat. (Pictures are at the end.)
I immediately retraced my steps in a hurried pace. It would be very easy to spot her hat. I saw a couple that I had passed before and I remembered they had smiled at Hana so I asked them if they remembered if she had the hat on. They said they did, so from the point of where I passed them to where I realized the hat was gone was not a very long stretch and it would have been gone only a few minutes. I combed the area. I checked the playground in the area. I talked to the groundskeepers. I asked a few parents at the playground. The hat was not to be found. Someone must have picked it up soon after it dropped.
If you are wondering why I care so much about a super cute hat it is because it makes people smile at Hana instead of look at her with concern and then look quickly away. Instead of seeing her NG tube and wondering what is wrong with her, they look at her hat and smile and comment on how cute she is! I know it is just a hat, but its also not just a hat. I know it is just a thing, but it still makes me sad that it is gone.
If anyone finds the hat, please let me know!