Hana had a fussy night and I think I was up every ten minutes or so for a couple of hours. Maybe this is her new normal? Maybe this is her acting like the six-month old that she is? It’s funny, when we brought her home from the hospital, part of me thought we would be trying to get her back to the baby she was when all this started, forgetting that she is a month older! Of course she is going to be different, she is now six-months old instead of five.
It was a good day – she had smiles and laughs for us! She also had some major poopy diapers (the kind where poop shoots up their back). She also vomited before bed. So, I guess this is the new normal, another day with Hana. She didn’t nap well at all, one time she rolled off her bed (we have a lowbed, which is a infant safe mattress on the floor instead of a crib). She drooled a lot, so maybe she is teething again. She is a lot like a normal baby, with normal baby things and you could almost forget that she has a very sick heart.
I write the above sentence and it feels eerie, the part, “she has a very sick heart.” I wish I were saying, “She HAD a very sick heart.” When I see her doing so well I have confidence she is going to be fine. I don’t know if I am setting myself up for disappointment. I don’t want to take the wellness she has right now for granted. I don’t want to forget many of the things I’ve learned and discovered and felt and feel. We have her today. When I was putting her down for bed. I felt her little body under my hands as I patted her to sleep. I kissed her and I felt grateful that I got another day when, at one point, I thought I wouldn’t get one and I felt lucky and grateful that I had another day with Hana.
Hana's Heart 
The pictures are precious!! I love the denim jumper! Such a beautiful baby and so happy despite everything she is going through. Here is to another day! Love you guys! 💙
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I adore the picture of Hana, Paul and Poppy sleeping – so precious! I know we have we have not been very close friends since we were young, but I still tear up every time I read your posts and want to hug you tight and cry with you…and be there to help you. Still praying for Hana and you all every day, Kathleen. You are so incredibly strong and I admire you for how well you seem to be doing through all of this. Amazing.
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Cutest pics yet! Hope today is even better! Let everyone know what you need. What days or times and what they can bring, or do for you😊 Wish I could be there. ❤️✌️🙏
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Beautiful pics! Thank you for sharing! Hana looks amazing! Praying it is all in the past and hope the new day brings even better moments for the three of you!
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Wanted to also share that this post made me put things in perspective and think about times when I get frustrated, tired and depressed regarding things in life. Staying present and being grateful for everything we have a the current moment is so important! Thank you!
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Now that is a precious selfie!
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sending you love
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So beautiful! That is all any of us have, one more day, one moment. And each is so precious. We love and miss you!
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I like the one with Paul, Hana and the dog sleeping!!
And the one of Hana’s face, sideways.
And I can see why your Dad likes the selfie too!!
I sure hope Hana keeps up the smiles!! If she smiles, we all do.
Love from North Carolina!
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Katie giggled at the one with Paul !
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